Musings

Self-Talk

I have had a heck of a month my friends.

A lot of activity; a lot of feelings; a lot of commotion.

What I find fascinating though, is that most (if not all) of the chaos I’ve experienced has been almost entirely in my own head.

Things I had decided were important haunted me.

Decisions I had made (or not yet made) took up many of my waking thoughts.

Failures I had deemed catastrophic, really weren’t a problem for anyone else.

I was so caught up in my own stories about what was and wasn’t happening, I wasn’t able to see the reality of the world.

It has truly been one of the most stressful months of my life in the last few years.

I wish I could say that I was able to fix things.

But I wasn’t.

I couldn’t.

Some things (both inside and outside of my head) were not fixable.

What I had to do (eventually, and with help), was to recognize the truth of it. Then… 
Let. It. Go.

Some days are just like that.

Some days I get stuck in my head, and I think my imagination is real.

Some days are grief-filled and troublesome.

But the real problem is not the bad days.

The problem is my judgment about the bad days.

When I believed that I was at cause for the stress, the stress got worse.

When I stepped back and just let myself have a “get-back-in-bed-and-pull-the-covers-over-my-head” day,

somehow it got better.

I did one other thing… 

I reached out to people.
People who see my wholeness, even when I cannot.

My musings this month are dedicated to reminding you, what I myself was reminded – 

You are not your thoughts.

And bad days are not the end of the world.

And I will hold you in your wholeness, as my people have held me.

Rachel

Steve Farber is one of the people in my world that sees not only my wholeness, but has created a body of work that invites EVERYONE into leadership. 

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